Impostor Chicken!!

      This morning it was so nice outside that, despite the fact that I knew my chickens would probably  venture beyond the boundaries of my property into my now congenial neighbor's yard outskirts, I flung open the doors of their coop and watched them greedily pour out into my sunbathed backyard.  With nothing but delectable springtime morsels on their minds they were all determined to go as far as necessary to find the prime location for grub hunting.  I knew this could only end in neighbor wrath, but I couldn't bring myself to leave them cooped up. So I went inside and decided to ignore the situation.
      Later I went outside to see if my confounded dog had dug any holes in the yard even though I already knew the answer.  I saw Stella at the edge of the road, about to venture into some neighbors' bushes.  Oddly enough, she was alone.  Usually she has a chicken posse who will only leave my backyard if she is leading the way.
     So I grabbed her and locked her in the coop along with a few other chickens I surmised could eventually become accomplices.  I went back inside.
     Later I returned to the backyard to see Stella OUTSIDE the coop eating birdseed in my other neighbors' yard - a favorite spot of hers, or was it Stella?  I looked in the coop and Stella was there.  Double Stella!!  Which one was the REAL Stella?
     I started chasing the Stella duplicate and she was really fast so I decided she was the impostor and I had the real Stella confined.  So I left again and decided it was my neighbor's problem to deal with the Stella foe.
     I started doubting myself.  What if that WAS Stella?  And if it wasn't, my neighbors will think it's my chicken and I will get blamed!  WHO IS THE REAL STELLA?!
     I went outside and let both Stella's out.  I looked at both of them, but couldn't tell the difference.  This is why I never get the same kind of chicken, I'm bad at small differences (by the way I'm married to an identical twin).  I tried to catch one, but couldn't catch either.  What a mess.  Maybe they're both impostors, maybe there are two Stellas!
     One was slightly smaller and at the moment, seemed more skittish.  A light bulb went on in my head  Attila will know what to do.
     I chased one of the Stella's over to Attila and gave the matter over to her.  No one knows Stella better than Attila, they both share the head hen role, and are matriarchal colleagues.  Attila did a double take, and then started chasing her!  Impostor Stella! I found you!!!  I quickly joined Attila and ran down duplicate Stella.  I grabbed her up and walked across the street and set her in my neighbor's chicken run.  I came back and found the REAL STELLA eating birdseed in my other neighbors' yard.  I lured her back with wheat and set her back in the coop.
Enough chicken adventures for today.


You are the absolute best. Your stories crack me up!

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